Each one of our participants in the Online Dating Experiment brings something unique to the discussion about online dating. MJ, a 31-year old from Appleton, Wisconsin, gives us the perspective of using online dating in a small town.
Because of where she lives, we connected her with Match.com, one of the bigger online dating sites. We wanted to see if having a greater pool of guys to choose from affected her search.
Here’s what MJ had to say about her second month on Match.com:
So you’ve been using Match.com for 2 months now. How’s it going?
MJ: It’s going just ok. Not much has changed since month one, and it’s been a little more disappointing this month.
How many dates have you been on? Do any of them have potential?
MJ: Still haven’t been on a date. The guy I had been texting with stopped responding and any of the guys I seem to find interesting don’t continue responding to my messages. I’m still getting some likes and winks, but it’s been difficult to get a conversation going for more than a message or 2 with most of the guys. I still think there are a few guys who have some potential on here, but they either aren’t interested in me, or are extremely slow to respond.
What’s been the most surprising part of online dating so far?
MJ: I think the most surprising thing to me is that it has turned out to be very similar to my other experiences in online dating. When I first got on Match, it seemed like there was a lot of activity and messages that came my way, which raised my expectations for more interactions and dates. But other than still getting winks, it has been difficult to cultivate any type of conversation that would lead to an actual date. Unless, I’m apparently willing to go out on the first interaction and/or am willing to make out with that person!
Have you learned anything about yourself or your dating preferences in the process?
MJ: Um, good question! I’ve learned/reinforced the fact that I am looking for a quality relationship, not just any relationship. As much as I would like to date more, I’m okay with being single and seeking someone who truly walks with the Lord instead of just any guy. I still really want to be married, but I’m continuing to work on being comfortable in where I’m at, as well as being open to new opportunities. I am still hopeful to go on a few dates through this, but even if I don’t, it’s been a good experience in learning to communicate and express myself in a different way.
You’ve had time to get a feel for the site by now, what do you like most about the site and what do you like least?
MJ: I still think Match has the most options in my area. There seem to be a lot of guys within a reasonable distance and that would make it easier to move beyond the online world. I also think they have the best mobile app. It is much easier to use and includes pretty much all the features of the website in the app, unlike some of the others I’ve seen. What I don’t like is that despite what their profile may say, many of the guys don’t seem to be interested in more than a casual date and there isn’t a lot in their profile to determine their faith or involvement in their faith other than a simple multiple choice identification.
Which do you prefer: the mobile app or the website? Why?
MJ: I actually am pretty okay with both. Once, you have it all figured out (because there are so many options!) the mobile app has pretty much all the same features as the website. So I probably use the mobile app a little more frequently, just because I always have it with me!
On a scale of “This is the most fun I’ve had in a really long time!” to “I’m ready to throw my computer in the river!” how do you currently feel about the process?
MJ: I’m not ready to throw my computer in the river, however, I’m also not very hopeful anymore. It’s almost becoming more of a chore than anything really exciting or fun. Hopefully, something will spark this last month, but I’m not really expecting much.
Check out MJ’s first month’s experience here. To read about other participants in the Online Dating Experiment, go here.
